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Punk: Nothing But A Goddamn Poser

Artistic portrait photography of the 1970s, inspired by Planet of the Apes, featuring Dr Zaius, a sophisticated ape dressed in a traditional professor's attire, complete with a suit, tie, and spectacles, posing confidently like a human, with a serious expression, against a muted, earthy-toned background, lit with soft, warm lighting, emphasizing the subject's wise and intelligent facial features, with a slight hint of curiosity in his eyes, and a subtle, enigmatic smile, showcasing the ape's unique, humanoid characteristics, with meticulous attention to texture and detail, in a warm, sepia-toned color palette, reminiscent of vintage photography.

10 November 2009

The Forbidden Zone

I like to reside in my imagination most of the day. To the causal observer I must seem alert, coherent and productive because I haven't gotten into much trouble over it. However, as I'm going through the daily motions a fantastic screenplay is flickering in my mind. For example, I spill a carton of orange juice and think to myself "what would Peter Griffin do?" I chuckle as I search for paper towels. Peter would probably blame it on Captain Jean Luc Picard at which point the entire crew of the…

Teddy Ruxpin

09 October 2009

The Blunder Years

Whatever happened to predictability? The milkman, the paperboy, evening TV? Casual drives over the Golden Gate Bridge and neon windbreakers to protect us from that brisk Bay Area sea breeze? Back when times were simpler and the world had three fathers- and by no means am I referring to the holy trinity. I’m talking Danny, Jesse and Joey. All were miserable failures with personality dysfunctions but somehow were able to pull themselves together to raise America’s favorite girls. What this countr…

A cinematic keyframe of a dimly lit, smoke-filled room with a shallow depth of field, vibrant cinematic color grading, and dramatic cinematic lighting, featuring a rock star in the foreground with a vague expression, surrounded by strippers, women, and empty bottles, with a vignette and bokeh effect, captured with a filmic aesthetic, reminiscent of kodak porta 400 and cinestill 800 film stocks, shot with a leica m10 camera, inspired by the styles of maciej kuciara, jama jurabaev, and wojtek fus, with a color palette that exudes a sense of excess and debauchery, cool tones and warm hues blending together in a chaotic yet captivating scene.

You Know How I Know I'm Gay?

The last couple of months have been filled with rock stars, strippers, drugs, girls and way too much alcohol. Cool, right? Late nights and lots of confusing mornings… If being backstage has taught me anything it's that I am completely out of my element. It's 6:30 pm as I'm wiping the drool off my face and fumbling around the nightstand for my glasses. I laughed and shook my head, instantly followed by a long swallow and a groan- I could feel my brain still sloshing in last night's bourbon. I s…

1980s. A frustrated young man sits in front of a mirror. He's writing and torn pages sit on the floor all around him.

Ghost in the Machine: A Pop Culture Junkie's Confession

Recently I decided that I needed to take a sobering look at my life. In an effort to figure out why I've constructed an impenetrable barrier of genuine feeling, I cleared my mind and went exploring. I thought about my past and how every decision I've made in life has lead up to this exact moment of contemplation. I thought about the future and how completely selfish I am. The next several years seemed to have no consideration of family, friends, or the inkling of a significant woman. That disgu…

In the background, a highly detailed and realistic x-ray of a chest takes up the entire frame, with a subtle gradient of grays and whites, on top of which a high-resolution illustration of a broken heart is prominently placed where the heart would be, with blood dripping from the heartache in a dark crimson color, the broken heart illustration is rendered in a mix of bold lines and soft textures, with cinematic color grading and cinematic lighting applied to enhance the dramatic effect, the image features a shallow depth of field, a noticeable vignette, and a beautiful bokeh, reminiscent of photographs shot with kodak porta 400 film or cinestill 800, captured with a leica m10 camera, with a filmic quality to the overall aesthetic, and a carefully crafted color grading that amplifies the emotional impact of the scene.

Declaration of Honesty

The façade of my vociferous "happily single" column onslaught can no longer be kept up. That really bums me out. It has nothing to do with putting my foot in my mouth or the painstaking conversations that will ensue once a certain few get their hands on this confession. No, the lies can no longer continue because an amazing woman has crept under my skin. "Under my skin" is such a disgusting and horribly visual phrase. Like a splinter starting to fester, turning red as it swells. That exactly is…

3.7 Seconds

I have a picture hanging on my bedroom wall of a beautifully discontent woman. The LA skyline is in the background, black and white. The woman’s tank top is white and her hair is black, rich sun-kissed skin glowing. Her eyes are closed but if she were to open them she’d be looking at her shoes. Her posture, however, is what ties this picture together. She’s confident. Her shoulders, cheeks and lips have not been defeated. Her head is heavy but her spirit is on fire. I find myself thinking abou…

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